A New Year, A New Beginning
by Belles7
Summary: Akashi has feelings for Kuroko, but he keeps them silent. He spent Christmas with his family in Kyoto, but now that the new year is coming, perhaps a new beginning will be coming their way as well?
1. Chapter 1

**A New Year. A New Beginning**

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><p>Summary: Akashi has feelings for Kuroko, but he keeps them silent. He spent Christmas with his family in Kyoto, but now that the new year is coming, perhaps a new beginning will be coming their way as well?<p>

Disclaimer + A/N: Italics in the center are lyrics from the song _Because Tears Are Overflowing_ by Jessica.

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><p><strong>*Chapter 1: Because Tears Are Overflowing<strong>

_Little by little, I walk towards you, little by little_

_Soon I've come close enough to where I can see you_

Akashi sat in a coffeehouse, cloaked in his black overcoat and simple jeans. He buried the lower half of his face behind the red scarf and wrapped his hands around the warm coffee cup, absorbing the heat it radiated. He stared at the blue-haired man working behind the counter, rushing back and forth as he hurriedly but expertly prepared the customers' beverages.

A tiny smile graced the red head's lips, still hidden behind the scarf.

_But just watching you like this won't be the end_

_Today, yet again, a boy like me is standing here_

When the red head caught Kuroko's attention, he simply held a hand up in greetings. The blue head nodded curtly, reciprocating the greeting with a soft smile. Akashi crossed a leg over the other, relaxed against his padded and comfy chair, and straightened the crinkly newspaper. He scanned the document for the latest news, waiting for Kuroko's shift to be over. He had all day to wait.

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><p>"Domo, Akashi-kun," Kuroko greeted, sliding into the chair across from his red-haired friend. He held a cup of vanilla milkshake in his left hand and lowered his head to take a sip from the cold drink.<p>

Akashi frowned. "Tetsuya, you shouldn't drink cold things when it's already cold. You could get sick."

"I like vanilla milkshakes, Akashi-kun."

"Still, drink something warm."

Kuroko sighed. "Next time then."

Akashi smiled. "Did you finish work?"

"Yes. Why did you wait all day for me, Akashi-kun?"

The red head tilted his head. "Is it wrong for me to stay warm all day, Tetsuya."

"No of course not. So you weren't waiting for me?"

Akashi chuckled. "Of course I was, Tetsuya. How was your Christmas?"

Kuroko forced a smile. "It was peaceful."

The red head nodded, seeing the pained expression in those blue orbs. He hid his frown behind his scarf and reached his hand out, placing it over the blue head's. "Tetsuya, I told you you could come with me to Kyoto for Christmas."

Kuroko shook his head. "No. It's fine, Akashi-kun. I didn't want to intrude upon your family's time. Besides, I had some work to catch up on."

"How many classes are you taking this coming term?"

"Four."

"Me too," Akashi murmured, prying the lid off his drink. He peered down at the empty cup and tossed it into the trash.

Kuroko frowned. "Akashi-kun should get up and throw his trash away properly."

The red head smirked. "Just practicing my shooting skills, Tetsuya."

"I know Akashi-kun plays basketball often, even though he has college classes and meetings to attend."

"Let's play one-on-one sometime, ne?"

Kuroko nodded, getting his coat on. He buttoned the dark blue coat and stood up, standing next to Akashi who quirked a brow. "Where's your scarf?"

"Ah. I was in a rush today, so I forgot to bring it."

Akashi removed his scarf and began to drape it around the blue head who stepped back, gently gripping his wrist. "Akashi-kun, please put your scarf back on."

The red head shook his head. "No. I'm perfectly warm. Feel it."

He took Kuroko's hand and pressed it against his throat, sharing the warmth with the blue head's hand. "See, Tetsuya?"

Kuroko could feel his cheeks warming up from the contact. He nodded and Akashi proceeded to place his scarf around the phantom. Akashi took a step back, nodding his head in approval now. He pointed at the door and said, "Now we can go, Tetsuya."

"Thank you, Akashi-kun."

The red head smiled and pressed his hands against Kuroko's back, leading him to the door. "Come on. Let's get you home, Tetsuya."

_When my tears overflow and become a river, and become an ocean,_

_Do you want to know more about me, who loves only you_

_Can't you be on my side so you can endlessly laugh and endlessly cry with me?_

_Because I will love only you even though it hurts so much_

The friends walked together on the street, feeling the cold winter wind blow against their faces. Akashi quickly reached his hand out to pull Kuroko against him as a car drove by, splashing water where Kuroko had once stood.

The blue head stood with his face pressed against the solid chest. He could feel his heart beating loudly in his ears and slowly removed himself from the red head who asked, "Tetsuya, are you okay?"

Kuroko nodded, looking distant as he thought about things. "Yeah. Thank you again, Akashi-kun."

The red head shook his head. "It's fine. That was nothing much. I wouldn't want you getting wet and sick, would I?"

As they walked back to Kuroko's apartment, Akashi glanced at the silent friend. He wanted to walk closer to the phantom and hold those cold hands, swing them back and forth like lovers did, but he couldn't. He wouldn't because he knew how unprepared Kuroko was for a relationship.

Akashi looked away, staring up ahead now. Disappointment surged throughout his heart and he wanted to sigh, but he didn't. He remained calm and reserved as the silence ensued.

"Akashi-kun, thanks for being a good friend," Kuroko suddenly said, locking those blue eyes onto the red head. Akashi stared at those ocean-like orbs that he always adored since he first met the phantom basketball player.

"Why do you suddenly say that, Tetsuya?"

Kuroko stared at the night sky, clasping his hands behind his back. "I thought about a lot of things over Christmas and I realized how fortunate I was to have Akashi-kun as a friend. You helped me through my darkest time. I don't think I would've survived if it weren't for you, Akashi-kun."

He gave the red head a breathtaking and sincere smile. "Of course, Aomine-kun, Kagami-kun, and the others did help me a lot during high school too. But you even went to the same college with me, Akashi-kun."

Akashi nodded, silent. He remembered the year they played against each other during the Winter Cup. That was the first year Kuroko played with Seirin and won the tournament; and that was the last year Kuroko played basketball. A few months later, he sustained a severe injury from a car crash with his parents both dying. The rest was a blur of what seemed to be endless pain and torment for the phantom.

Kuroko looked away, his hands gripped each other tightly behind his back. "I'm really happy that I met you in middle school, Akashi-kun."

"Tetsuya," Akashi murmured, wanting to comfort the man. "Do you remember what I told you during Winter Cup?"

Seeing no reply from the blue-haired man, he continued, "I told you that I was really glad to meet you, Tetsuya. You changed my world. I learned a lot of things that day and I'm still grateful to you."

Kuroko smiled softly. "I guess we're both grateful to each other then, Akashi-kun."

The red head nodded. He shoved his hands into the pockets of his overcoat, trying to stop himself from reaching out to grab those hands. "Indeed."

_How did my heart grow to love you, how_

_Do you even know that I circle around the same place all day_

_I'm afraid that the lonely wind will be cold, too cold_

_You don't know how the wind is as it blows in_

Akashi stood in front of Kuroko's open apartment door. The blue head was currently holding Akashi's hand. "Are you sure you don't want to come in, Akashi-kun? You walked me all the way back home. I should at least treat you to-"

"It's okay, Tetsuya. I don't mind walking you back home. I'd do it everyday if I could."

Akashi retracted his hand from Kuroko's, feeling their fingers brush. He wanted to touch the blue head and caress his face, and whisper to him that everything was going to be fine. He so wanted to utter those three special words to the man whom he had fallen deeply in love with since high school, but he couldn't because he didn't want to disturb the peace Kuroko had just established.

"Okay then, Akashi-kun. Thank you for walking me home again."

Akashi nodded, forcing a smile. He was about to turn and go, descend the stairs as he usually did whenever he dropped Kuroko off at home, but his body remained frozen. He wanted to step inside the cozy and inviting apartment; he wanted to make up for the four years of lost time he could have spent with Kuroko as his precious lover.

"Akashi-kun?"

The red head turned back around to look at Kuroko. _Touching him once won't hurt. _He extended his hand, lifting it up, and caressed Kuroko's soft cheek. He cupped one side of the face and bit back a longing expression that wanted to show itself on his face. He could feel the yearning emotions screaming from his aching heart. He resisted the urge to close the tiny distance and kiss those pink lips.

"Akashi-kun?"

"...Let's stay like this, Tetsuya. Just for a little bit."

"O-okay."

_When my tears overflow and become a river, and become an ocean,_

_Do you want to know more about me, who loves only you_

_Can't you be on my side so you can endlessly laugh and endlessly cry with me?_

_Because I will love only you even though it hurts so much_

Akashi slowly lifted his other hand up into the air and cradled the other cheek of Kuroko's. His red-yellow eyes bored into azure ones. He didn't blink because he wanted to savor and absorb this one chance to keep the blue head in his vision. If only they could stay like this forever. No. Not forever. That wasn't good enough. Just touching and holding his face like this wasn't good enough. He wanted to do more, desired and dreamed of being Kuroko's only lover.

The red head unconsciously leaned closer, taking his sweet time. Kuroko's pale face quickly warmed up as the face closed in. He stood, feeling his heart jump and skip a beat, glued to the ground.

Akashi blinked, forcing himself to get out of his dazed stupor, and averted his eyes. He looked at the ground for some seconds, recollecting himself, and gazed back at the flushed blue head. His thumbs stroked the slightly red cheeks as he reasoned, for the sake of persuading himself, "Tetsuya, go back inside before you get sick. Your face is getting red from the cold."

He removed his hands away from the warm face and took a step back, lifting his hand as a farewell. He watched the man nod, trying to sort things out as well. _What just happened?_, Kuroko thought to himself.

_You in that place, you who never answers, my heart wants you_

_Can't you wait for my love, so that I can reach you?_

"Good night, Akashi-kun," Kuroko softly bid, slowly closing the door. His blue eyes held a look of cautiousness, confusion, curiosity, and sadness.

Akashi nodded, a torn feeling erupted in his heart. "Have a good night, Tetsuya. I'll see you soon?"

"Yes, Akashi-kun."

Soon, the door closed and Akashi found himself standing in the dark outside the apartment. His fists clenched as he turned to descend the stairs. _Tetsuya._

_If you love me, look back at me, just a little faster_

_Hold my hand before I move on, before my love dies out_

_Can't you be on my side so you can endlessly laugh and endlessly cry with me?_

_Because I will only love you even though it hurts so much_

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><p>AN: Ahhh. I finished Kuroko no Present, so I decided to move onto the theme of New Year. Honestly, I was a bit sad to finish Kuroko no Present which is why this story is kind of sad-ish, but you never know what may come with the new year. Happy things! Anyways, listening to this song while writing this really created the mood. I also listened to it while I re-read it. lol. Oh and this story's probably going to be at most 3-4 chapters; maybe even less. It's supposed to be short ;)


	2. Chapter 2

**A New Year. A New Beginning.**

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><p>Disclaimer: Lyrics are taken from SNSD's song <em>Forever.<em>

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><p><strong>*Chapter 2: Forever<strong>

Kuroko lied restless in his bed that night and it wasn't because he was thinking about Akashi's odd behavior from earlier. It was because he had a nightmare again. The blue head curled into a fetal position and hugged himself, trying to remain calm. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to fall back asleep. He was peacefully sleeping before, but after he had the nightmare, he woke up startled as usual.

With his eyes closed now, he remembered what his doctor had once told him. _Calm yourself. Take three deep breaths. _The blue head exhaled triple times, taking his sweet time, and reopened his eyes. He whispered to himself, "I'm fine. I'm fine."

He tucked the warm blanket under his chin and drifted to sleep.

_Following the happy breeze, beneath that bright sky that blinds me_

_Beautiful melodies and fresh air fills this road that I'm walking with you_

_Do you remember? Those awkward and unfamiliar times when we first met_

_I'm thankful to you for silently taking care of me when I was hesitant and young_

In Kuroko's second dream, he was walking with Akashi in the middle of a park. It was a bright and sunny day; the birds chirped happy melodies almost as if they were singing to them. The blue head was in the middle of an enjoyable conversation with the red head who looked back at him, giving him his undivided attention, and smiled.

"Akashi-kun." Even in his dreams, his heart thumped at the sight of the red head's rare smiles.

And then Kuroko was in his old house, the one he lived in with his parents before they died. He sat on his bed, crying as he packed his bags, getting ready to live with his aunt. He didn't want to leave the house full of cherished memories, but he had to. At least he would still be able to attend Seirin, that was what he thought at the time.

Soon, he was lying on the cold, hard, and wet cement. There were sirens wailing loudly and Kuroko found it hard to open his eyes. Nonetheless, he forced his eyes open; his vision was messy as he lifted his head, feeling a rush of dizziness wash over him. And when, he sat upright on the ground, he spotted the car on fire. Across from him was the body of an injured Akashi.

He limped over, running to the best of his abilities, and frantically assessed the unconscious red.

"Akashi-kun. Akashi-kun," he continuously cried out the name in worry.

"He's dead, son," a voice told him. Kuroko sobbed, shaking his head. "Akashi-kun's all I have though! He can't die!"

The phantom shot up in his bed, gasping from the too realistic dream. He threw the blanket off his body and ran out the apartment, almost forgetting to lock it.

_My exhausted heart beats once again_

_My weak heart has found light again_

_I want to hold your hand and walk like this forever_

_Together with the person I love in a world just for the two of us_

Akashi cracked one red eye open as he tiredly opened the door to his apartment. Who was eagerly knocking on his door so early in the morning? When he opened it, he found himself tumbling down to the ground as a somewhat light weight clung desperately onto him.

"Tetsuya?"

Watery blue orbs stared down at him as he lied on the ground, flat on his back. Tears streamed down the blue head's face. "Akashi-kun. You're alive."

"Wha-" Akashi started, when all of a sudden, the crying man let out a relieved sob and shoved his face against the clothed chest.

"Tetsuya, what's wrong?" Akashi cradled the distressed friend and tried to sit upright without upsetting the blue head even more. He stroked the crown of powder-blue hair and stared at the open door, reminding himself to shut it before proceeding with anything.

"Tetsuya?" he murmured softly.

Kuroko shook his head, keeping his head glued to the shirt. "Sorry for disturbing you, Akashi-kun."

Akashi smiled at the thought of Kuroko in his arms. He was actually in the middle of a very nice dream before he woke up. Kuroko and him were on a date. He wrapped his arms around the smaller male, rubbing Kuroko's back in a soothing manner. "Did you have a bad dream?"

Kuroko nodded and the red head hugged his friend even tighter to his body. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"...But you have to sleep, Akashi-kun."

"You're more important, Tetsuya." Akashi lifted Kuroko's face up with a single finger. "Can you stand up? Let's talk in a more comfortable area, okay?"

Kuroko finally realized that he had tackled the red head right in front of the door and knocked him to the ground in a rush. He hurriedly got off the man who chuckled at the sudden panicky state. "It's fine, Tetsuya." Akashi dusted his pants and shut the door locked.

He gently grabbed Kuroko's arm, leading him into the living room. "Let's talk in here, Tetsuya. Take a seat. I'll go make some tea so you can relax."

Right when he was about to enter the kitchen, he noticed that the sitting blue head was barefoot. _It must have been scary enough to send him running immediately out the apartment._

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><p>Kuroko took a sip from the tea, clutching the warm mug in his two hands. He needed all the warmth he could get. He turned to look at the waiting and silent Akashi who offered him a reassuring smile. A feeling of guilt and embarrassment crossed his mind and he apologized, "I'm deeply sorry for waking you up, Akashi-kun."<p>

Akashi shook his head and scooted closer to the blue head. "What was your dream about, Tetsuya?"

The phantom placed the mug on the little table and positioned his body so that he was fully facing Akashi. He folded his knees, with his feet on the couch, and placed his chin on top of his knees. His brows furrowed in distaste as images of his dreams flashed in his mind.

He muttered, "I had two nightmares."

Akashi leaned closer, nodding. "Yes?"

"The first one was about...you know, the accident, and the second one was about..."

Akashi cupped the teary face. "You can do it, Tetsuya."

Kuroko tried to stop the tears from falling, but the red head sternly said, "Tetsuya, if you need to cry. Cry. You know that holding it all in won't do any good."

_Those unforgettable memories during that long time_

_Throughout the laughter and the tears, the one who always believed in me was you_

The blue head nodded, sobbing as silently as he could. He felt fingers brushing those tears away from his face and looked at the red head who had a sad look in his eyes.

"What happened in the second dream?"

Kuroko took a sharp breath of air and tried to calm his breathing. His shoulders jerked up and down, matching his shaky breaths. "Akashi-kun...died."

Akashi scooted even closer now and embraced the whimpering Kuroko. He hugged the shaking frame and soothed, "Tetsuya, I won't ever leave you. You ought to know that by now. I am going to stay with you forever."

"B-but death isn't-"

"Tetsuya. I am absolute. I'll fight death if I have to."

And for some reason, Kuroko found himself crying even harder. He clutched the red head's shirt, leaning against the taller man even more for support. "Akashi-kun. Don't die then."

"I promise I won't, Tetsuya."

Kuroko shook his head and lifted his trembling hands as he, then, cupped the red head's face. A desperate look crossed his usually deadpan face. "You can't leave me. You have to stay with me. I need you..." His head lowered, shaking as well. "I can't lose you too. If Akashi-kun's not here, there's nothing left for me."

_My exhausted heart beats once again_

_My weak heart has found light again_

_I want to hold your hand and walk like this forever_

_Together with the person I love in a world just for the two of us_

Akashi's eyes widened at the verbal confirmation and he smiled softly. "I'm staying with you forever."

"Akashi-kun, I'm glad I have you."

_I love you, Tetsuya._ Akashi rocked Kuroko in his arms. "You need to eat more, Tetsuya. You're too light."

The smaller man's eyes drooped to a close. It fluttered open a few times before slowly shutting again. He murmured drowsily, "I'm short. That's all."

The red head smirked in amusement, rubbing Kuroko's back. He glanced down at the crown of blue hair and found Kuroko's head stuck to his chest again. He quietly asked, "Tetsuya, are you sleeping?"

"...Mmm." There was a tiny stirr of movement from the man.

He chuckled softly. "Only dream of me then, Tetsuya. I promise you there'll be no pain. I'll take it all away."

_No one will bother us_

_There's not even a reason to waste any time_

_(Sometimes) We could be far from each other_

_(With the same heart) The same heart as one, dreaming the same dream_

"Do you want to know something, Tetsuya?"

There was no response and the red head smiled knowingly. He was free to confess his love then. "I always dream about you, Tetsuya. You're the only thing I need in this world. So don't die. If you did die, I'd be heartbroken as well."

_Even if a very long time passes _

_Even if you and I become a bit different _

_I want to dream forever with you like this_

_The one who fulfilled my wishes, the one who became my faith, with you_

He continued to rock the blue head to sleep, stroking the blue hair now. "Let's only dream of each other then. No one will be sad."

He kissed Kuroko's forehead and carried him, like a bride, to his bedroom. He gingerly placed the sleeping male onto his bed, tucking the thick blanket up to his neck now; he stood, staring at the blue head with a yearning look.

_Even if a very long time passes _

_Even if you and I become a bit different _

_I want to dream forever with you like this_

_The one who became my miracle, the one who dreamed with me, with you_

_Even if a long time passes, I want to dream forever with you_

He sat down on the edge of the bed and extended his hand, brushing the blue bangs away from Kuroko's closed eyes. A sad smile appeared on his lips. "If only I could turn my dream into reality, Tetsuya, I would be even more happier. Would you be happy if my dream came true?"

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><p>AN: Thanks for reading :)


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Important News**

Due to changes in my circumstance, I will be able to continue my stories again. Thank you for reading and reviewing. I apologize for all the stress and confusion. I will return to ffnet in 2 months of time once things have settled down. I will never forget all the reviews left by you wonderful readers. Thank you very much for keeping me strong when things were dark and when I was so close to abandoning you all. Seriously blessed to have people support me and my passion.

Hope to see you soon :)

Belles7.


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